Dear Middle America,

I once idolized you; in fact it was my dream to walk upon your golden paved roads. A world where riches were plentiful, work was meaningful; all the while life was surrounded by a white picket fence. I really believed in the American dream, and you know what? I am the butt of a colossal joke. The only thing at the end of the rainbow is a muddy puddle. It is on your backs that American culture is founded. You ultimately drive every market, be it commercial, social or other. That power has gone to your collective heads. Instead of innovation you settle for stagnation. You collect stuff, and more stuff until the house is full. And, then in your perverted wisdom, you buy a bigger house and fill it with even more useless stuff. It was once thought that you were the saviors of society, the cogs that drove capitalist machine, but in reality you are nothing but mindless lemmings that buy into everything and understand absolutely nothing. Money is the not of root of your evil, rather abject stupidity is the cause of your demise. The wealthy are greedy for more wealth, similarly the poor are as greedy for the wealth they do not have, but what about you? You are just as greedy as the wealthy, while equally as impoverished as the poor. You were supposed to embody the perfect American ideal, a life that allowed for modest luxury but tempered by a sense of fiscal restraint. The demagogues wonder why morality is a thing of yesteryear; well it is not hard to figure out. The modest live like tyrants, sitting upon their golden thrones demanding more all the while giving oh so little. You live well beyond your means and it shows in the children, a generation of spoiled brats who have the world at their fingers, who choose to spend their time emulating your meaningless decadence. Therefore this letter is my official resignation from the Middle American cause. I can't make it better, but I sure as well am not going to make it worse.


Go to hell

The wicked itch is dead. Turns out I had the mother of all yeast infections, which my entire body had a violent allergic reaction to. The cure may have been worse then symptoms. In order to diagnosis my condition the doctor had to stick his hand inside my anus.......I almost remarked that he should feel honored as he was the only the second person to have ever stuck an appendage in my rear, but decided against it. He then made out a prescription for a single pill. Said medication came in a small pink box that specifically stated it was used for vaginal discharges arising from yeast infections. So it seems my mother was right, I really am a giant pussy. Anyway, I feel much better now, even though my dad is probably going to kick me out within the next few days.... Battered women shelter here I come.




Go to hell