If Fox News Says So

Two-Term President

Of course, Kerry could always pick up 80% of the provisional ballots in Ohio. I wouldn't hold your breath, though.


Go to Hell

Spare the rod, Spoil the child

I know from experience that children need beaten to keep them in line. I don't support child abuse, at least not as a regular practice. But it does a kid good to have their bottom smacked with a glass filled bag. I like to call it character building, and it is a nice way to relieve stress.


Go to Hell

Something seems different.

The new and improved template is up and running. I am happy with the design--thanks Janelle.

There are some minor issues with firefox but one can still view all blog entries with the browser. If you want to see all the changes, please use IE, Netscape or Opera.


Go to Hell

We won't know who wins tomorrow's election for several days, if not weeks. My position is well known--I am avid supporter of George W. Bush. He is a better man than John Kerry, however; I will admit that John Kerry is a better politician. Many will argue that personal morality means nothing in the political arena; also, this same amoral group will argue the benefits of being ruled by robotic overlords who exist only to anally probe the population with plastic sporks. Whatever floats your boat or results in internal hemorrhaging.

Bush will not now, or ever, engender widespread support in Western Europe. John Kerry will be much more popular with the French, German, English and other socialist states. Will this translate into more support (Great Britain aside) in the War on Terror? No, it won't. The French and Germans have their own agenda in the War on Terror--like us, they will serve their own interests. I would argue, and quite successfully so, that when the United States is self-serving the entire world usually benefits; we will see if the same can be said for France, Germany and the like.

Why does this even matter? It really doesn't, at least not in terms of our security and prosperity. But, foreign relations with Western Europe (and perhaps Russia) is the only clear area John Kerry trumps President Bush. Maybe I shouldn't dismiss it and if the public opinion of European Union Member States means a lot to you--vote for Kerry. Otherwise be good little boys and girls and vote for Bush. Or, simply don't vote at all (also known as a Vote for Nader).

Remember a vote for Kerry-Edwards is a vote for sexual molestation by the mechanical minions of Nit Nac, the Almighty Overlord of Robotic America.


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Dad, it is good to know that you have a sense of humor, albeit at my expense.



Go to Hell

The Halloween party was a blast and I got to show my ass, literally. I did throw up this morning, which is bad, but the vomit only contained blood and bile --no gross chunky bits to clean up. Below are several pictures of me towards the end of the night, pay particular attention to the attractive woman (Anita) using a riding crop on my ass. Dreams do come true. They really, really do.


Next time on Maury: Fat Children and the Goth's who worship them.

Mein Kampf

You like me, you really do.

Crop on Ass Action



Oh, and thank you Chase for sharing with the world the hilarity that is Baby Bob Gone Wild.



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I am going to a Halloween party. My costume is meant as a commentary on the roles of race and gender in the upcoming Presidential election. What costume can do such an important subject justice? Well, the answer is my costume: a giant baby.


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Silver Bullet is an underrated horror classic. Remember when Corey Haim wasn't a burnout, or when Gary Busey was a crazy lunatic--ok, the last one has always been the case. Anyway, this is a fantastic film adaptation of a Stephen King short story.

I am not a big fan of King's, or at least not his written work. I can't stand his prose but I fully admit that he has a rare genius: he creates vivid stories that serve to both scare and delight (writes like shit, though). I know this from watching the various films based on his work, and I have suffered through a couple of his novels, one novella and several short stories.

Definitely check out the movies based on his work, and if you have stomach for it, read his novels, novellas and short stories. Though, make sure to stay away from Misery and Riding the Bullet; both are horrendous reads and the cause of many a mediocre nightmare.


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This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

My erudite peers never cease to amaze simple minded me. They deconstruct the lingustic foibles of a man who is a two-fold Ivy League graduate--a feat that is only surpassed by his ability to fly fighter jets. He is definitely the village idiot. I am such a dullard for ever thinking otherwise.

Of course, his occasional lapse into the mispronounceable[1] could easily be attributed to the heterogeneous nation we live in. God damn the vernacular diversity of our country, why can't we all speak in accordance with the wishes of Mary Newton Bruder, God Rest Her Anal Retentive Soul.

I know that the millions of doctors, lawyers, programmers, teachers, accountants, writers, politicians, and, yes, even retail managers who fail to live up to standards set forth by the disciples of Bruder (which must include all the cerebral inclined folk who commented on my previous post) are simple minded dullards--I am just glad for all the company.

I just hope that you, the intellectual elite and inheritors of Robert's Rules of Order, apply your just and unbiased criticism to all peoples; we can all learn so much from your perfect purveyance of the English language.

Go to Hell

P.S. I wanted to write about sexual harassment but I got stuck after opening the post with, “The Whore deserves to suck on horse scrotum."