I don't like Bill Gates. I do respect and fear him, like most of my schizophrenic brethren; after all he does watch me constantly via the cameras installed in my molars. My problem with Anthony Michael Hall is two-fold: I am a jealous of his incredible success and, more importantly, pissed that his Windows XP Service Pack 2 (SP2) caused an infinite reboot loop on father's computer.

I spent nearly six hours attempting to discern the how and why of the problem; I was unable to find either answer. After flirting with the idea of putting my fist through the motherboard, I concluded the problem would be better served by wiping the hard drive clean and reinstalling Windows XP. Thankfully, dad primarily uses his personal computer to surf eBay and check his webmail, so nothing was lost beyond his IE Favorites list. Eight hours later (apparently a couple years ago, dad bought the last computer built with a 2x CD drive ) the computer was up and running again. While reinstalling the cable modem software it hit me; Windows Update had installed SP2 the day before the infinite reboot loop had begun.

Gates, damn you straight to hell. You are the reason that I fear ubiquitous computing. A world where my stove shoots hell spawned flames and the toaster impregnates my wife; all because the Windows HA (Home Appliance) operating system had compatibility issues with the new update.

Go to Hell