The little brother has a girlfriend. He speaks with her on the phone every night for hours at a time. Since he is only seven years old I find that to be totally unacceptable. Of course I am also extremely jealous of his "relationship". It isn't the girl herself that bothers me because I am way over dating eight year olds. In fact unless she is twelve, or at least an emotionally developed eleven, I don't even show interest.

The problem is that my kid brother has a more worthwhile life than me. He has friends, the love of his parents, and now most importantly a woman. To make matters worse I never actually spoke with a non-grandma woman on the phone until age 17. I was a god damn senior in high school before a girl called me. And she only spoke with Bob because of an interest in a friend at the time, Jasper the Friendly Joke.

Even when I think that this is as low as it gets, my life manages to degenerate further. I would like to think it could only get better but we all know it is only going to get worse.


Go to Hell