Bill Simmons is my hero. He is a living composite of several college buddies, minus the need to cause senseless mayhem and, plus the ability to write a functional sentence. As I said in an earlier post: I don't like sports; but I still find his weekly column(s) to be comedy gold.

Oh, and you want to know why the Yankees will always own the Red Sox:

"We've been waiting since 1918 for the Boston Red Sox to win the World Series, and ... if I had a choice between the White House and the World Series this year, I'm going to take the White House. How's that?" -- John Kerry

A Yankees politician (Rudy Giuliani) wouldn't choose between the two, he would say "I am going to take the White House and the Yankees are going to win the World Series, of course."

That is the not so subtle difference between a consummate winner and a souless liberal.

Go to Hell