I need to lose weight. My goal is to drop an Olsen twin, give or take three bulimic episodes.

Why this sudden desire to lose weight? Is it for health reasons? No, it has nothing to do with my 180/110 blood pressure reading, skyrocketing cholesterol, or inability to climb a flight of stairs: I want to lose the weight for a much more important reason; I need to get laid.

It is my sincerest hope that Bob will be able to have intimate relations by years end.



Go to Hell